I awoke this morning to a feeling I have not felt before. I heard his voice, so I asked father God if I was ok. I asked him if he too felt this feeling, I heard no reply. But then it dawned on me. This is due to it being a new feeling, a fresh sense of me shining through, and my only answer for this, is finding him.
I went on to complete the house work. I then danced with my daughter in my arms and sang to her. She felt that her mummy is happy; she looked at me deep in my eyes and smiled.
It is so surreal to me, especially after deep thought. Thus far no one has ever made me feel like I could forgive my past wholeheartedly until now. There has been no one until now, who through words alone could have touched me and helped me to realise, life is too short to continue trying to hold love and pain in one hand.
That saying people pass through your life for a reason is so true. It surely allows me to understand how I feel today, is simply because I allowed those who were not meant to be in my future to pass through and those who are, to remain. Those who remain are my inspiring touch of faith, hope, encouragement and love.
You once said to me lets be friends first, I want you to be my best friend and allow us to flourish from there on in. If ever there was someone who did not want to jump right in, try to woo me off of my feet, only to realise that they themselves are not ready to love so thoroughly. Therefore allowing me to fall back on my own two feet and fend for myself.
I think about this and sigh. Everything happens for a reason, most are deeper than the eye can see to understand. I thank you lord for your guidance, as you truly opened up the gates with this one, and surely have blessed me internally and externally.
I can now hand on heart say “I forgive you my past”. Therefore I am washing away the pain, hurt, regret, guilt, misery, feeling of no self worth and the built up frustration you instilled into my body, of which allowed me to stop Loving the real me. Prevented me from feeling how I feel today. Refreshed…
Is this the end of my past, yes it is, I rebuke you in Jesus name and I will always hold my head high from this day on because it was never ever my fault. You can forgive and forget. The situation will still remain true. But holding onto it can only destroy you internally and make your external you disappear without you even knowing it.
I say to you now, it is not too late, and I thank you Mr for sending me therapeutic words of which helped me to understand how true love is really meant to feel. You are love in every sense of the word and if ever you leave, I will not be sad or unhappy, because I am glad to have had the pleasure of you being a part of my life.
God Bless you and I pray that Love continues to flourish and nourish within you and me, allowing us both to grow, bond and share more love to the unloved.
Love You ;0) xx
I am only human, allowed to make mistakes, and yes I know I do not know the answer to everything. Therefore My fight in life must go on. There are several things I must accomplish, good health, success, wealth and to raise my child surrounded by genuine Love.
I never claimed to be anyone else other then myself. I am stoned by many, but no matter what they may say. The truth be-known, I am a daughter, sister, mother, aunt, cousin, grandchild, friend and most importantly. I am a child of God, in his eyes I am unique…
Always learn to Love you, it is only then when you can Love others. Be truthful to yourself and never allow others to put you down ;0)x
Written by: Y. JT Blake ©2011